That is the word that comes to mind when I think about my life right now. I know the amazing blessings that I have right before me everyday, and yet somehow, someway in the deepest parts of my soul, things are just, well, stale. Where's the joy? Where's the excitement?
Isn't it funny how (at least for me!) you come to the point where things are not right? You've identified at least that, but then you don't really know why or where to go from here. That's how I felt last night. Frustrated, not knowing what to do with my new realizations that things are not right.
So this morning I continued reading in our small group book and it hit me. (Don't you just love that?) I've been looking for the joy in my circumstances. I know joy doesn't come from the circumstances, but I was looking for God to give me joy in those circumstances. Because after all, I do know that joy comes from the Lord.
I just wanted to Lord to revive my heart and to help me experience the joy that I know I should feel when I'm taking care of the kids, cleaning, cooking, doing ministry things, etc. But I was missing one MAJOR piece. And you know what, it is SO simple and yet SO complex!
I realized that I have gotten really good at this thing we call the "Christian life". You know, I discipline the heart of the child not the behavior, I read God's Word, I do Beth Moore studies, I love my husband, I serve serve serve, I even teach some, etc etc etc. But I also realized it has almost become routine, it's just what I do. And so I read in this book, "I realized that duty, forced obedience, and works never satisfied my soul."
All those good things can never satisfy my soul. They can never bring me a lasting joy. And then I read this, "When a maiden is in love with her dance partner, she is delighted in the dance, totally engaging her heart with her beloved partner. She looks into his eyes, seeing his admirable qualities, living in the deep joy of the moment of being held in her lover's arms."
I was missing Him! I am so caught up in living for Him, that I forget why! IT'S ALL ABOUT HIM! My heart had become stale because I forgot what it was like to be in love with Him. He is the reason I should want to do any of these good things. Pleasure and joy is only found in His presence. And that is exactly what I wanted.
My book said, "Clearly joy is an issue of the heart. Joy is not found in performing for people or in doing all the right things for God. Nor is joy in the absence of difficulties or problems. Joy is found in the presence of God in the midst of all circumstances, in delighting in the life he has given."
And so I leave you with this...
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Saturday, May 22, 2010
The life of a Martin Boy
I (Ed) grew up with two older brothers. I guess that means I don't have to explain much else. But I will. My brothers and I hardly spent much time inside when we were little. We had odd, but exciting imaginations where we would go outside and make up weird games and create projects. Summers were not filled with camps and cello practice. Instead, we would be in the backyard early in the morning and come in either when it got dark or after the mosquitos had completely emptied our skinny little legs. Our backyard did not have a blade of grass from 1980-1997.
Thought I'd give that background before you saw the following pictures. Life as a Martin boy is never boring, always imaginative, and typically outside.
This is where it gets interesting. Katie and I bought new dining room chairs which means six 3 foot boxes. Can't let those go to waste. They became the meanest defenders you've ever seen...thanks to my sweet art skills (thanks Mrs. Hadley). Micah wanted to impersonate each one.



Thought I'd give that background before you saw the following pictures. Life as a Martin boy is never boring, always imaginative, and typically outside.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Caleb is 2!
We celebrated Caleb's birthday on Sunday. I cannot believe that little boy is two already! He is so fun to be around and if he feels comfortable, he likes to be the entertainment. And unlike other kids, sometimes in my own family - sshh! - he is genuinely funny! He keeps us laughing with his facial expressions and limited vocabulary.
We had a little party with some family over and here are the pics...





And for a little side note, please go on over to my friend Jenn's blog to see the Swagger Wagon video if you haven't already. It is so good!
We had a little party with some family over and here are the pics...
And for a little side note, please go on over to my friend Jenn's blog to see the Swagger Wagon video if you haven't already. It is so good!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
A Much Needed Break...
I've been busy, real busy. My days have consisted of laundry and cleaning and organizing and cooking and packing, along with my other daily activities.
You see, tomorrow I head out of town by myself. All alone. No husband, no boys, no baby. Just me...well for two hours. Then I meet my dear friend Jen, and head on down to Hilton Head Island. There we will join 6 other of my dearest friends all from seminary. This is the first "reunion" since we left 4 years ago. Some I haven't seen even longer than that!
Except for the few babies that are still nursing, and Haleigh is not one of them, it is just the girls! Four whole days of rest, relaxation, the beach, the pool, eating seafood, possibly reading, and yes the countless priceless conversations we will have ALL.WEEKEND.LONG! I love it! And I haven't even been yet!
The best part about the weekend is that not only are these girls some of the best friends that I have, but they are partners. Being in full time ministry is just rare. And when you have others who know exactly everything you face, the role you are in, the ups, the downs, well, it is just priceless!
So, Girls, I am SO READY! See you tomorrow! And well, for the rest of my family, pray for them!
This is where I will be all weekend! Or at the beach...I can't decide!
You see, tomorrow I head out of town by myself. All alone. No husband, no boys, no baby. Just me...well for two hours. Then I meet my dear friend Jen, and head on down to Hilton Head Island. There we will join 6 other of my dearest friends all from seminary. This is the first "reunion" since we left 4 years ago. Some I haven't seen even longer than that!
Except for the few babies that are still nursing, and Haleigh is not one of them, it is just the girls! Four whole days of rest, relaxation, the beach, the pool, eating seafood, possibly reading, and yes the countless priceless conversations we will have ALL.WEEKEND.LONG! I love it! And I haven't even been yet!
The best part about the weekend is that not only are these girls some of the best friends that I have, but they are partners. Being in full time ministry is just rare. And when you have others who know exactly everything you face, the role you are in, the ups, the downs, well, it is just priceless!
So, Girls, I am SO READY! See you tomorrow! And well, for the rest of my family, pray for them!
This is where I will be all weekend! Or at the beach...I can't decide!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Easter
Was Easter really 2 1/2 weeks ago? Well, I couldn't let it pass without sharing some pictures because we have some treasures!
And yes, Caleb was with us on Easter, but we didn't get any pictures of him, because he was sleeping when we took them all! But trust me, he looked adorable!
We RARELY get good pictures of Micah because he hates getting his picture taken. But this one turned out really good!



And I must say my little darling looked so sweet! I made her dress and was really excited about it. I actually made it with her dedication in mind, but decided to let her wear it for Easter to get another wear out of it! I found it on Etsy for like $35 and made it for $21 ($10 for the monogramming). So not a bad deal!



And yes, Caleb was with us on Easter, but we didn't get any pictures of him, because he was sleeping when we took them all! But trust me, he looked adorable!
We RARELY get good pictures of Micah because he hates getting his picture taken. But this one turned out really good!
And I must say my little darling looked so sweet! I made her dress and was really excited about it. I actually made it with her dedication in mind, but decided to let her wear it for Easter to get another wear out of it! I found it on Etsy for like $35 and made it for $21 ($10 for the monogramming). So not a bad deal!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
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